Business Coaching: Dealing with Negative People

We’ve all been there before… The day is moving along just like we hoped and then “WHAM” we run right into the negative wall, or in this case person. All the momentum we’ve been building is suddenly stopped dead in its tracks. Furthermore, the current moment has left the future direction and speed uncertain. So what do you do when you encounter negative people? The following seven tips should help you get back on track faster and move forward again.

• Negative People Tip #1 – Get Back to Basics – What were you working on and why were you working on it? Identifying what the current project at hand is as well as why it’s important will get you refocused on what you were doing. Moving forward again will re-engage you!
• Negative People Tip #2 – Forget About ‘Em – Perhaps the hardest aspect of dealing with negative people is putting their “negativity” behind you. However, you’ve got no control over them (even if they work for you), so move on. Consider your encounter with them to be just a speed-bump in the big road of life!
• Negative People Tip #3 – Update Your Radar System – You are going to encounter negative people, even if you’re at Disney World (aka, the “happiest place on Earth”). If you know that you are going to encounter them, why not plan your “escape” before you get into the situation? Doing so will allow you to enter the situation with confidence and exit with panache!
• Negative People Tip #4 – Be More Selective – You have a choice every hour of every day regarding what you will do and who you will do it with. Make better choices regarding what that is and who it is with!
• Negative People Tip #5 – Dr. Phil Them – I don’t want you to break out your best Dr. Phil impression and ask negative people to lie down on your couch and say “tell me your problems?” However people are often negative because they are currently occupying a “negative” space in their lives. Asking why they are there and how you can help them get from there to a “positive” place just may be a difference maker!
• Negative People Tip #6 – Go To Your Happy Place – Being negative is easy when it comes right down to it. It takes a lot of effort to stay positive when you encounter these types of individuals. When you do, remove yourself from the situation and go to a place where you can refocus, recharge and re-energize yourself!
• Negative People Tip #7 – Stay Positive – Negative people want you to come over to their side if you’re positive. Just because they want you to join their “Pity Parade” doesn’t mean that you should. Avoid doing so at all costs!

Following these seven Negative People Tips will make you more productive and positive. One of my coaching clients told me “Life’s short, play positively and you’ll succeed!” I like that…

Take a moment to complete the “Dealing with Negative People Poll” and tell me how you deal with those negative people in your world. If I can further assist, reach out to me at sp@pathosleadershipgroup.com.

Who the Hell is James Strock and Can He Save Leadership? 12 Tips on Becoming a More Effective Leader

I had the opportunity to spend time with James Strock, author, speaker, and executive educator on 21st Century Leadership. If the saying “If you don’t know your history, you’re bound to repeat it!” is true, then you must get to know James and his work. He has the unique ability in possessing dual vision, with one eye on the past and the other towards the future.

His next book, “Serve to Lead: 21st Century Leadership System” discusses how leadership today is different. Here are twelve of his thoughts regarding just how different things are for leaders and the serious issues to be challenged with:

1. Technology – Is the vision of Hanna-Barbera and George Jetson very far off?
2. Ethics – We operate in a “transparent” society… Kiss privacy good-bye!
3. Service – Everyone can lead because it’s so easy to serve at the current time.
4. Empowering – Becoming “empowered” is easier today than it ever has been.
5. Consensual – There exists a consensual relationship between the leader/non-leader.
6. Love – The Beatles sang “all you need is love” and so does James!
7. Relationship Transition – There is today a transition from transaction to relationships.
8. Dynamic – Kick “static” relationships to the curb.
9. Custom – There is no universal or “one size fits all” leadership methodology.
10. Convergence – Leadership styles are converging (Think Mr. Cosmo Spacely meets John Maxwell)
11. Imagine – Another Beetle sighting… Think “strawberry fields forever!”
12. Public – There is no leadership in private?

If you don’t know James work, get to! He was motivational, inspirational and at times controversial. When was the last time you met someone that told you that Tom Peters and Jim Collins are wrong?

You can find out more about James at his website… http://www.jamesstrock.com/

If you’d like to see where you “rank” versus the 3,000+ business leaders that we surveyed for our book, “The Influential Leader” please visit http://www.gotinfluence.com/ and take the 2 minute survey. You’ll receive a report that shows where you compare versus them on the 10 critical skills that made them successful!

Sam Palazzolo, MBA, CPLP, RODP
Pathos Leadership Group
www.pathosleadershipgroup.com

Is the Magic Back?

Ahhhh... March Madness! Does anything quench the Influential Leader's sole like college basketball? I spent last week traveling, so what better way to take some "down" time to watch wall-to-wall basketball. Being a Big 10 Varsity Athlete, I was especially pleased to see Michigan State University and Tom Izzo breeze through their first two games. Hard to believe that it's been 30 years since Magic Johnson lead MSU to the title in 1979. Even more hard to believe that they won the 2000 championship!

So what's the secret to their success? Anyone that knows anything about Tom Izzo knows that it all boils down to one thing. Every team in the NCAA - Division 1 athletics has got star athletes. Every college hosts their teams in what could only be called modern day coliseums. Every team has great athletic training programs. So from athletes to facilities, everything is pretty even. What's the secret then?

The Influential Leader has the secret! It's hard work. So simple, yet few actually accomplish success because there is an extreme lack of hard work. Magic used to tell tales of running up and down the court in practice until he puked. So what are you working so hard at that you actually "puke" afterwards?

If you'd like to get the "Influential Edge" and start working hard, send me an email at sp@pathosleadershipgroup.com and let's start today! You'll join the thousands who've participated in our programs that are tasting success today, even in this economy! You'll also get in on the ground-floor of our exciting 2nd Quarter of 2009 programs. What are you waiting for? Oh you already work hard don't you? There's a big difference between working hard and hard work... Drop me a line and we'll spend 10 minutes together to see where we can go together!

Sam Palazzolo, CPLP
Pathos Leadership Group
www.pathosleadershipgroup.com

Types of Business Coaching

Kris Koonar writes an excellent post on the types of Business Coaching available today! View it here... http://stepstosuccessmadesimple.com/blog/types-of-business-coaching.php

In our Executive Coaching practice here at Pathos Leadership Group, we touch all of the items mentioned. There seems to be a lot of confusion regarding what a coach will and won't do... Our answer is simple: "If you wan't to get the 'Influential Edge!' we've got to first and foremost determine what you want. From there, it's all hard work and effort!" In other words, there is no shortcut/magic pill which you can take to get to where "success" lives.

To schedule a Complimentary Coaching session send me an email (sp@pathosleadershipgroup.com) today... It will be the best 20 minutes you spend!

Sam Palazzolo, MBA, CPLP
Pathos Leadership Group

The Influential Coach - Vistage VI

Are You “Getting Real”?

I just completed a week-long training session in San Diego, California…It has got to be one of my favorite places on Earth! Six days with 22 of the best coaches in the country (No Mom…I didn’t count me!). The seminar focus was on how to be the best coach possible. Let me rephrase that…the BEST Coach you can be! It was an awesome experience and there were several times when I was driven to tears. Why?

The focal point of the week was spent on what I’ll call “Getting Real”. What exactly is “Getting Real”? This is the concept that Susan Scott tackles in her A1 book titled “Fierce Conversations”. Here’s the concept…Most conversations are either superficial, superfluous, non-value added, fake, crappy, avoiding the real issue, beating around the bush, miss the mark, etc. Why? Here comes the BIG Ah Hah for the week…There is pain associated with finding the truth, or “Getting Real”!

This probably never happens to you…You need to have a conversation about something, but you avoid having it. If you have the guts, you do have it, but you miss the mark regarding what the conversation is all about or should be about. The issue for the most part go’s unresolved…Regardless of how small, sooner or later this issue becomes HUGE and you are miserable. Here’s an analogy…A frog that gets placed in boiling water jumps out. Why? The frog senses the temperature difference (HOT!) and doesn’t want any part of it so it jumps out of the boiling water before becoming frog soup. On the other hand, a frog that is placed in a pot of water at tap temperature that then gets the heat turned on gets cooked! Why? The frog didn’t sense the temperature change and its fate or destiny was determined…One order of frog soup coming right up!

Consider that frog in the second example to be the issue that never gets resolved because we lack the courage to “Get Real” and have the fierce conversation…We’re frog soup!
So what kind of conversations are you avoiding in business? What conversations are you avoiding in your personal life? Which are the ones that will lead you to become soup like our green friend?

Here’s the plan…write me an email at spalazzolo@pathosleadershipgroup.com and tell me what your conversation is that you are going to hold to help you “Get Real” as well as the date you commit to having it. How will I help? I’ll email you on the date you say you are going to “Get Real” and have the fierce conversation. Why? If I don’t keep you honest and “inspect what we expect” you and I both know what’s going to happen…NOTHING!

Come on…Let’s “Get Real”!